Chapter 37 - Better Man

Ben tries to visit me every day. There are days that he has other things to do. Those days are the worst days.
The day that I can leave jail is getting closer and closer.
Ben still refuses to tell me the secrets he is keeping. But he stopped teasing me with it. Finally. I was about to smack him upside the head.

I’m slowly getting my things together. Just three more days till I’ll be a free lady again. Ben and I spoke it all through and we decided not to go to Paris yet. Ben assured me we will go there some day. But for now he wants to take me back to Soñador. The Bed and Breakfast of Ericas in Seville. I need some time to get used to be in the real world again and Ben and I need time together. Without being on the road all the time.

I did not agree with it first. I did not want to take any more of Ben’s road trip time away from him. But he did not change his mind.

“We can always go to Paris later.” He assures me. “How long are you able to stay in Europe with your new visa?” I ask him. Ben shrugs. “Long enough hopefully. At least till June.” He replies

I sigh. At least we will have four more months together. And we will see what happens after those months.

When I return to my cell Aña is looking sad at me. “I can’t believe you are leaving me in three days. What am I supposed to do without you? And you aren’t even close enough to visit me.” Her shoulders sagged and she looks up at me with teary eyes.

“I will surely try and visit you every once in a while. It’s only a four hour drive.” I promise Aña. “I hope to see you back sometimes.” Aña says. A tear is rolling down her cheek.

“I promise I won’t forget about you Aña. You made my time in prison bearable. You helped me through the roughest times and I will be there for you whenever you need me.” I assure her.

I give Aña a big hug and we hold each other tight. Isn’t it weird, that at some point I don’t want to leave prison. The only reason I don’t want to leave is Aña. But that’s a damn good reason.
And I will miss Alfonso and Felipe. I will even miss the scary girls on the other side of the hall.
But I am looking forward to continueing my life with Ben, outside these prison walls. I can’t wait to see more of Europe and maybe even going to see other countries outside Europe someday.


I’m leaving today. They finally let me go.

I should be happy, but I am crying. Being inside this prison for four months, with the same people around me. People I became friends with. People I used to get things I need. People who used me to get the things THEY need.
I feel like I have spent a whole lifetime between these walls.

“I will miss you a lot.” Alfonso pulls me in his arms for a hug. He gives me a big kiss on my cheek. “Oh dude, your mustache tickles.” I giggle. But hold him tight. “Thank you for everything Alfonso.” I say. “You changed my being with your happiness. And you made me see there is more to life than work. Thank you Senhora Lynn. I hope I will see you again. Please don’t forget about me.” Alfonso rambles and I giggle. “How can I forget about you Alfonso. Every time I see a brush I will think of your mustache.” I laugh and pull Alfonso’s mustache.

Aña is a mess. She avoids looking at me and Ben. I’ve got one foot out the door but I can’t leave without promising Aña that I will be coming back to see her soon.

“Ready miss?” Ben asks while holding out his hand to me. I grab it. “For sure sir.”

We walk out of the prison doors together, hand in hand. Leaving another part of my past behind me.

I look back one more time. “Bye.” I whisper softly before joining Ben into the car.

“Nice car.” I say. “Did you rent it?” I ask. It still smells new. “Nope. It’s ours.” Ben grins. “I thought it is cheaper to buy a car than to rent one for months.” Ben says.

I smile and run my fingers across the dashboard. “I really like it.” My fingers stroke the leather of the seats and I look at all the lights and the buttons. “Don’t even think about it.” Ben laughs when I stick out my finger to press a random button.

“But buttons are there to be pushed on.” I pout, reaching out to touch another button.
Ben grabs my hand and kisses my finger. “You can’t just press every button.” He laughs while gently biting my finger.

“For sure I can.” I grin. Ben starts the car but keeps an eye on me. “No you can’t.” He laughs. “Wanna bet?” I reply. Ben is still holding my hand.
“You can’t drive and hold my hand at the same time.” I tease. Ben lets go of my hand and I immediately reach out to the buttons again. “You are such a kid.” Ben sighs. He lets me explore the buttons and I am happy once I found the button to the radio.

I lean back into my seat. “Can I sing?” I ask Ben when I hear Queen on the radio. Ben laughs. “If you sing quietly.” He teases.

I shout out loud. “I‘M GOING SLIGHTLY MAAAAAD.” With the worst voice. I can’t continue singing because of laughing so hard. Ben is looking at me like he is in pain. “LYNN!” He groans. “That really hurt my ears.” He laughs. I am nearly choking. “I bet I can do it better than that.” I tease.

“IT FINALLY HAPPENED.. Oh yeaaah. I’m slightly MAAAAAAAAAA……” I can’t finish the sentence because Ben is muffling me.

I giggle against his hand. “Are you going to be quiet now?” Ben asks with a grin. I nod and Ben removes his hand.

“Oh dear.” I say. We both laugh out loud and I turn down the volume of the radio.

I place my feet on the dashboard and look outside. The fields are not as pretty as they were four months ago. The cornflowers and poppies are withered and dry. They are affected by the cold winter. I can’t wait for spring to set in.
I lean with my head against the window and enjoy the view.

It takes us 5 hours to get back to Seville and Erica is already waiting for us on the porch. I jump out of the car and run into her waiting arms. “You can’t believe how happy I am to see your face.” she says while hugging me tight. “I missed you Erica.” I say and hold her close.

I take a step back to look at her. Her hair is shorter and lighter than I remember. The house is still the same, though the windows might need to be cleaned.
The olive trees are empty. I wonder who harvested them.

“It’s all over.” Erica smiles. “I know. No more Rick to run away from.” I reply with a faint smile.
I still can’t believe it sometimes.

Erica looks at Ben and lifts an eyebrow. Ben shakes his head slightly. I look from one to another.
What are they up to?

“What?” I ask. “Nothing.” Erica and Ben say simultaneously.

I get a weird feeling in my stomach.

Again with the secrets. Can they stop please?

I lift my chin and walk past them. If they want to have secrets fromme, then I have to ignore them. I plop on the couch. Ben walks in and sits down next to me. I turn my head, avoiding looking at him.

“Lynn.” He starts but I am still looking at the wall. “Lynn, can you listen to me for a moment. I have to tell you something.”

I knew it. He’s leaving me.

He must have fallen in love with someone else.

I wonder how long he’s keeping this a secret from me.